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High Flying Miss

Discussion in 'YachtForums Yacht Club' started by Yacht News, Nov 28, 2011.

  1. Yacht News

    Yacht News YF News Editor

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  2. nossmayo

    nossmayo New Member

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    Reminds me of the story of the company developing a new plane;

    The factory where they made the planes was on a site adjacent to the premises of a manufacturer of toilet paper.

    Every test flight of the new plane resulted in the wings falling off and the crew parachuting safely to the ground.
    They tried all sorts of engineering solutions and permutations, always with the same result - the wings falling off.

    All of the R & D and test flights were observed by the guy who owned the toilet paper factory.

    One day he made his way over to the plane factory and was chatting with the owner just as another test unit crashed to the ground without its wings.

    The toilet paper guy asked if he might make a suggestion as to how they might overcome their engineering problems.

    "Sure" said the plane guy "we've tried everything we can think of".
    "What you should do is drill a row of holes all the way across the wing at the point where it is attached to the fuselage"
    "That sounds crazy" said the plane manufacturer, "but since we've nothing to lose, we'll give it a try"

    So, the next test flight was undertaken in such a plane, with holes drilled across the wing as instructed.

    The plane took off, circled and landed with no problems, wings still intact and attached.

    "This is a miracle" enthused the owner of the plane "How did you know it would work?"

    "Well, as the manufacturer of toilet paper, I know that it never ever tears along the perforated line".
  3. NYCAP123

    NYCAP123 Senior Member

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    1/3 of the screws missing? Makes you wonder what the number is before it's considered serious.
    "Air France have blamed aircraft mechanics in the Chinese city of Xiamen, were the airline's jets are often serviced because of lower costs." Need any more be said?
  4. Yacht News

    Yacht News YF News Editor

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    It is called "cutting corners" but at the potential peril of passengers and crew though?
  5. Marmot

    Marmot Senior Member

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    It is the "race to the bottom" as Boeing and Airbus fight each other to build and fix airplanes in China where labor is really really cheap.

    Once they fire all their American and European workers who the heck is going to buy all those airline tickets?
  6. Loren Schweizer

    Loren Schweizer YF Associate Writer

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    Everybody with a few screws loose, of course.
  7. Norseman

    Norseman Senior Member

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    Not the screws holding the wing on, but plastic fairing between the wing and fuselage. Worst case scenario: The fairing flies off and hits the tail.
    Even so, probably not fatal, it will only dent the leading edge of the horizontal or vertical tail.

    I have lost pieces of airplanes several times.
    Cheap maintenance to cut costs so as to sell cheaper tickets so as to compete with the low-cost carriers who out-source their maintenance to third world countires with 1 inspector and 50 peons with a tool-kit..:(

    After de-regulation everybody wants $25.00 tickets and the corners will be cut here and there, get used to it..:rolleyes:
  8. Yacht News

    Yacht News YF News Editor

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    Thes cut-corners will catch up to these airlines at some point you know.
  9. NYCAP123

    NYCAP123 Senior Member

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    :eek: I'm not thrilled when pieces fall off a boat and I'm at sea level.
    I've gotten to where I won't fly if it's not absolutely necessary (car, train or boat aren't available options) and someone else is paying. Between the cost and the annoying fees, the security checks and the cramped seating (even in first). Forget the tarmac delays, and then they can't give you more than a cracker?:( Now add to that "Maintained In China" and it becomes 'I want to fly why?':confused:
  10. Yacht News

    Yacht News YF News Editor

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  11. Norseman

    Norseman Senior Member

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    Yup and it started a long time ago: Remember Value Jet?
    They made pilots pay to get a job there to keep cost down, $10,000.00 for each position and only pilots who could not get a job anywhere else would pay to play. The captain on the DC-9 that crashed in the Everglades was an Eastern scab and unable to get employment without crossing picket lines or paying $10K to get hired.
    Something wrong with the background or qualifications perhaps? :rolleyes:

    Quite a few carriers fly to China for heavy checks and some US low-cost do their maintenance in El Salvador.

    Third-World Mechanics Paid $2 Per Hour For Boeing, Airbus Jet... | www.kirotv.com
  12. Norseman

    Norseman Senior Member

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    Well, nothing is perfect and you don't really need all them bits and pieces anyways..:D

    One time I lost a panel on top of the wing on a 747 the size of a King size bed: Heard a muffled bang but found nothing wrong and pressed on.
    Landed in Panama City and the flight engineer stepped out on the jet bridge to have a smoke and discovered the gaping hole on top of the wing.

    Another time I was leaving Miami for Bogota and heard an unusual noise right at V-1. Hit a bird perhaps but all the engine parameters was normal so we pressed on.
    Halfway there ATC (air traffic control) told us on the radio that there was bits and pieces on the runway we had departed from and it could be from our airplane. After landing we found the cowling on # 2 engine missing.
    03:00 conference call with the bosses, the FAA and myself.:D

    Aye, got more stories, but too early for flying stories, point is, you don't need all the bits and pieces to fly, just a few of them..:cool:
  13. Marmot

    Marmot Senior Member

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    Make sure you read all the comments before throwing rocks at the guy.
  14. airship

    airship Senior Member

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    This is the Yachtforums' "Yacht Club forum".

    Whenever I've posted in this particular forum in the past, I've always understood that a certain amount of 'leeway' was allowed. That some posters may have consumed a rum & coke too many etc.

    Yet, here we have Yacht News, starting a new thread about airplanes, as if there was nothing else worth talking about concerning yachts anymore?! By all means, and why not, I've already poured myself a Scotch?!

    But may I suggest that anyone here with any serious contributions to this thread affiliated to an aviation content, refer to say, this site, before embarassing anyone else here on YachtForums...?!

    In particular, Yacht News. Let him / her combat the simplicities / ignorances etc. of the original post and before an audience which has some true expertise in the subject...?!
  15. Kevin

    Kevin YF Moderator

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    Airship... I almost feel like editing your post just to clean up the crankiness.

    The YF Yacht Club is for "Off-Topic Scuttlebutt..." as the sub heading indicates. Within reason and good judgment we can pretty much chat about whatever we want in here.
  16. airship

    airship Senior Member

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    Kevin (a YF Mod) wrote:
    And I'm breaking "the golden rule" which everyone should respect when contributing to any online forum - never get into an argument with any Mod. on said forum once the Mods have announced themselves. Whatever the subject of the original argument, my own arguments are invariably doomed to failure because a Mod has expressed an interest in the thread.

    Norseman, (not the original thread-starter) apparently has 1st hand experience of the subject, having been a professional / commercial pilot before joining YF and/or becoming a yacht-personage here.

    Perhaps I'm drunk, mis-guided or whatever, but if in this case, there is any substance to the original post, then why post it here instead of another forum? Why allow Norseman (as the sole YF contributor with any valid experience), perhaps "to hold court" in this thread - the contributors here in YF don't usually have the expertise to discuss aircraft (let alone yachts...:D )

    I'm all for YF members being able to debate lots of stuff here in YF's Yacht Club forum, so long as the contributors respect other YF members and not simply assume that they can say whatever they want, or please individual YF Mods. :(
  17. Marmot

    Marmot Senior Member

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    There go your second and third mistakes.
  18. NYCAP123

    NYCAP123 Senior Member

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    "Respect". That's a very important word. Do you realize that most of your posts (not just in this thread) show an incedible amount of arrogance and contempt for Americans, YF Mods, fellow YF members and almost everybody else? If that's not your intention you should look into how to change that perception.
  19. Norseman

    Norseman Senior Member

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    Yeah but I was a Merchant Marine Sailor before I took up flying..Got bored with 6 weeks at sea and 6 months on the same ships.
    Then got bored with flying and took up sailing.

    Got bored with all that and turned to Yacht Forums for entertainment..:D
  20. Savasa

    Savasa Senior Member

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    Greetings all,
    I am reading this thread with a mixture of amusement (at the nit picking and conclusion jumping), interest, and trepidation (as I DO fly occasionally and although I don't drink, didn't stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night I can usually recognise an areo-plane at a close distance and often wonder how well the seat cushions REALLY float).
    Hmmm...Air France (AF) has it's servicing done in China? Are the technicians there NOT qualified service personnel and if not, why does AF allow this?
    Five days to notice missing fasteners? Is a pilot or someone in authority not required to do a "walk around" visual inspection on a regular basis? (I thought this was required before every flight).
    Newspaper article "facts" are hardly the basis for drawing ANY conclusions on MOST subjects.
    As to the Air India landing...Pfafff....65kmh gusts????
    Calgary windstorm: Lufthansa flight makes dramatic landing in 149km/h gusts | News | National Post
    The REAL bottom line in all of this no fatalities-a good thing.
    Peter